Personal Psalms

I have been journaling for much of the past 8 months. Mostly prayers and petitions for God's grace, mercy, and deliverance. And I got to thinking that most of those prayers are much like the Psalms of David. Are they inerrant? Mine aren't. Are they the truthful, transparent writings of my experience with life and God's frequent interruption in it? Yep. So how are they any less inspired than David's? At this point, I am not willing to canonize my journals,and I am not sure David was cognitive that he was writing "Scripture", but I am willing to concede that David was being moved by the Holy Spirit in such a way that was unique, and I from time to time have felt that same uniqueness when preparing sermons. Not unique in that I am writing something new, but unique in that what I am currently writing or working on is set apart from a normal letter of correspondence or journal entry and is in agreement with God's word and Holy Spirit.

So, here is my personal psalm for today; whether it be unique or common.

Where is my hope, but in you?
Where is my comfort, but in you?
Where is my rest, but in you?
Like a spider on a web I feel your tapping. I sense your vibrations.
I see your provisions, and yet I continue to question your goodness.
My mind deceives me, but you do not.
You are not a shifting shadow.
All good gifts come from you.
Your goodness is not determined by the weather.
Whether it be denim skies or driving rain, you are my keeper.
I am yours.

I have worn myself out by asking why.
I have sought some kind of cosmic envelope with special orders.
You have responded with "Trust and Obey".
You have told me to do the "Simple Thing".
You have called me to "Total Surrender".

In my desert you have sent angels of different types.
You have hemmed me in at every corner with saints.
How far am I to look for your provision and protection?
Out my back window?
Two doors down?
Down the alley?
I am surrounded by a great cloud of witnesses.
How can I continue to doubt? How can I allow fear to exist?

I have created my own cage.
You have released me, and yet I dare not step out for fear of pain.
My mind deceives me, but you do not.
You are not a shifting shadow.
You give all good gifts.
You are love, wrapped in flesh and bone, perfected in spirit.
You are radiant.
You are love.